There are things that happen in life that just make you do things you might not do other wise. There was something that happened in early February that kind of pushed me into applying for this job that i got. I keep saying i wish it wouldnt have happened cause i cant help but remember how good it felt so to speak, but if it wouldnt have happened i would have never applied for this job i would be in Ponca City working at walmart all over again which would be ok but i wouldn't get this opportunity that i am getting right now and i am so happy that i am here, but for some reason i cant get this thought out of my head and it makes things harder for me because i just dont know how to realize that i am better off my mind works in weird ways and it always has. I know it happened for the best and that this is where i should be but still it stays in my head that i wish i could change what happened in one way or another. No i am not saying i dont want to be here because I DO want to be here I guess i just want both. Which can't and wont happen. I just need a way to completely forget some stuff i dont want to know about it i dont want to think about it. I wanna be done. oh well i got this and am going to do great where i am at and i am so glad i am here meeting all these new people and getting to know them. I am having a great time just every once in a while i let my mind wander!
well sorry for ranting today, until next time take it easy!
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